Friday, May 25, 2012
I had a little glimpse of Heaven the other day. Not in the poetic, inspirational sense that is gushed about when gazing into the face of one's spouse or seeing the delight of a baby with a new discovery, not the kind that is turned into a Facebook picture with a smarmy quote & an Instagram landscape, but a real glimpse of and desire for Heaven.
I am a part of a small ladies' Bible study group in my area that is made up of women from many walks of life and a few different churches. This week, we just began our new study focusing on the book of 1 Peter. Before we started our study, we sang a couple songs. I sat there singing with all the other ladies, my baby girl on my lap, and in that moment I had my glimpse.
We all hear how Heaven is a bright and beautiful place where we will all be celebrating and praising God for eternity. And to tell you the truth, I always felt that sounded kinda like a letdown. I mean, yes, of course I want to go to Heaven and of course I like to sing praises to the Lord, but... all the time? Without ceasing? No coffee break or nap in between songs?
I always had that little bit of apprehension wondering if Heaven really was as great as it was supposed to be (I'm sure that it must be—it isn't Heaven for nothing, you know). I don't necessarily consider myself a pessimist, maybe more of a realist... and sometimes I will downplay my excitement about things because I would rather be pleasantly surprised than somewhat disappointed.
But I get it now. I felt perfect peace for that short time. We only sang two songs, but during those songs, I felt completely satisfied. I wanted nothing. I needed nothing. I was whole and complete and so totally at peace. I think now that total peace has to be one of the best parts about Heaven.
No matter where you are, you can always think of something to worry about (especially if you're a mother). Whether it's the car needing repairs soon, the house needing work, the bills waiting on the kitchen counter, your husband's foot paining him at work, your own back seizing for no reason, the kids being happy, healthy, and alive, maybe even something like a terrorist attack on your hometown... whatever it is, there's always something that could be worried about.*
Having that brief, Heavenly moment made everything so peaceful and the rest of the world so trivial and unnecessary. I could have sat there forever, singing & praising God. And now, I get Heaven.
*I've always thought that a mother could completely destroy Stephen King in a contest of thinking up macabre situations. I find myself imagining the most convoluted situations wherein my loved ones could be maimed or killed. I don't do it on purpose. I just think about my son going outside to play and then wonder what dangers are there that could be an issue. Then my brain starts to open up the full-to-bursting file drawer labeled "Potential Outdoor Hazards" and I start getting a bit anxious.